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thoodleoo:

booty shorts that say “for ritual purposes” on them

(via cloudbeam)

internetmessiah:

Hello, 911? *twirls phone cord around finger* sooooo how was your day? Did you arrest any bad guys?…No you hang up first! Hello? 911?

(via thebootydiaries)

trisarahbottoms:

*puts on eyeliner over yesterday’s eyeliner smudges* smoky eye

(via thebootydiaries)

soft-communism: “norebirth: “ me gettin up for work ” ❤☮☭folloш foя мoяе soft сoммцпisм☭☮❤ ”

witchcommunity:

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ethan-lawson-wate:

justabitunlikely:

so who do I get in touch with about marrying obama’s speechwriter

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(via thebootydiaries)